[me.. it's all i wanna be..]]

Friday, May 27, 2005

i miss them so much.. Mastura (left) and Nadhila

with a parrot @ Eko-Park, Bukit Merah Laketown

erm.. my last day at school..
i'm not sad but
rase sayang plak..
even though i work for 3 weeks
noting much to share here.. no idea..
listening to No Doubt's Don't Speak..
kind of bored..
i have lyric from Maroon 5
She Will Be Loved..
i love dis song for its' rhythm..
slow and nice..
got to go
Wassalam

Song: She Will Be Loved
Artist: Maroon 5

Beauty queen of only eighteen
She had some trouble with herself
He was always there to help her
She always belonged to someone else

I drove for miles and miles
And wound up at your door
I've had you so many times but somehow
I want more

I don't mind spending everyday
Out on your corner in the pouring rain
Look for the girl with the broken smile
Ask her if she wants to stay awhile
And she will be loved
She will be loved

Tap on my window knock on my door
I want to make you feel beautiful
I know I tend to get so insecure
It doesn't matter anymore

It's not always rainbows and butterflies
It's compromise that moves us along
My heart is full and my door's always open
You can come anytime you want

I don't mind spending everyday
Out on your corner in the pouring rain
Look for the girl with the broken smile
Ask her if she wants to stay awhile
And she will be loved
She will be loved

I know where you hide
Alone in your car
Know all of the things that make you who you are
I know that goodbye means nothing at all
Comes back and begs me to catch her every time she falls

Tap on my window knock on my door
I want to make you feel beautiful

I don't mind spending everyday
Out on your corner in the pouring rain
Look for the girl with the broken smile
Ask her if she wants to stay awhile
And she will be loved
And she will be loved
And she will be loved
And she will be loved

[in the background]
Please don't try so hard to say goodbye
Please don't try so hard to say goodbye

Yeah
[softly]
I don't mind spending everyday
Out on your corner in the pouring rain

Try so hard to say goodbye

[[get through this narrow, endless road alone]]*|9:26 AM|

Sunday, May 22, 2005

weather: heavy rain

feeling: blur

erm..

am i keeping something to myself?

if so, what is dat?

i dunno what's bugging me..

aku rase xsedap ati je..

dah byk ari dah..

just feel sick, tired..

maybe i have a desire but it cant be accomplished..

who knows?

i dun even know what i want...

i want to return to campus..

and start my new semester.. dat's all

i want to study.. i want to forget what happened along dis holiday..

warrghhhh...

erm..

peterpan's song are magnificent..

even though they seem dedicated to broken-hearted people..

below is the lyric of 'Ku Katakan Dengan Indah'

love the message behind dis lyric..

dedicated for every person dat hurts me..

got to go..

Wassalam

Song: Ku Katakan Dengan Indah

Artist: Peterpan

kukatakan dengan indah

dengan terbuka

hatiku hampa

sepertinya luka

menghampirinya

kau beri rasa

yg berbeda

mungkin kusalah

mengartikannya

yang kurasa cinta

* tetapi hatiku

selalu meninggikanmu

terlalu meninggikanmu

selalu meninggikanmu

** kau hancurkan hatiku

hancurkan lagi

kau hancurkan hatik

utuk melihatmu

kau terangi jiwaku

kau redupkan lagi

kau hancurkan hatiku

tuk melihatmu

back to *

membuatku terjatuh

dan terjatuh lagi

** membuatku merasakan

yang tlah terjadi

semua yang terbaik

dan terlewati

semua yang terhenti

tanpa kuakhiri

HiDd@Hidayah@Dayah

[[get through this narrow, endless road alone]]*|5:26 PM|

Thursday, May 19, 2005

emotion: blur, bored and sick

erm.. i think dis week is kinda miserable for me..

lots of unexpected things happened to me..

lepak kt skola nih pon buhsan je.. jaga budak peksa

ngantuk giler.. siap tetido lg.. huhu..

i feel guilty to certain people..

i didn't scold them.. or had a fight with them..

just tell them the truth.. what i feel..

sorry if i hurt all of u..

erm..

i'm attracted to dis lyric

Evanescence's Missing..

try to get in depth of dis lyric..

i think it's about left out person..

(maybe like me)

huhuhuhu..

got to go

Wassalam

Song: Missing

Artist: Evanescence

Please, please forgive me,

But I won't be home again.

Maybe someday you'll look up,

And, barely conscious,

you'll say to no one:"Isn't something missing?"

You won't cry for my absence, I know -

You forgot me long ago.

Am I that unimportant...?

Am I so insignificant...?

Isn't something missing?

Isn't someone missing me?

[Chorus:]

Even though I'm the sacrifice,

You won't try for me, not now.

Though I'd die to know you love me,

I'm all alone.

Isn't someone missing me?

Please, please forgive me,

But I won't be home again.

I know what you do to yourself,

I breathe deep and cry out,

"Isn't something missing?Isn't someone missing me?"

[Chorus]

And if I bleed, I'll bleed,

Knowing you don't care.

And if I sleep just to dream of you

I'll wake without you there,

Isn't something missing?

Isn't something...

[Chorus]

HiDd@Hidayah@Dayah

[[get through this narrow, endless road alone]]*|11:31 AM|

Sunday, May 15, 2005

erm..

nothing interesting today...

just wanna discuss something..

Q: what would u do if someone u love dun trust u?

for me.. trustness is crucial..

it is a foundation in a relationship..

relationship in dis case is not only for lovers..

but it doesnt mean when u lose ur trustness to someone..

u cant get it back..

and to another party.. u have to gain that person's trustness again..

erm..

my all-time favourite song's lyric is below

Yellowcard's Only One

kinda sad song..

lots of people misunderstand wif dis song's meaning...

up to them laa..

got to go

Wassalam

Song: Only One

Artist: Yellowcard

Broken this fragile thing now

And I can't, I can't pick up the pieces

And I've thrown my words all around

But I can't, I can't give you a reason

I feel so broken up (so broken up)

And I give up (I give up)

I just want to tell you so you know

Here I go, scream my lungs out and try to get to you

You are my only one

I let go, there's just no one that gets me like you do

You are my only, my only one

Made my mistakes, let you down

And I can't, I can't hold on for too long

Ran my whole life in the ground

And I can't, I can't get up when you're gone

And something's breaking up (breaking up)

I feel like giving up (like giving up)

I won't walk out until you know

Here I go, scream my lungs out and try to get to you

You are my only oneI let go,

there's just no one who gets me like you do

You are my only, my only one

Here I go so dishonestly

Leave a note for you my only one

And I know you can see right through me

So let me go and you will find someone

Here I go, scream my lungs out and try to get to you

You are my only one

I let go, there's just no one, no one like you

You are my only, my only one

My only one

You are my only, my only one

HiDd@Hidayah@Dayah

[[get through this narrow, endless road alone]]*|8:26 PM|

Saturday, May 14, 2005

aiyoo.. what a boring day for me..

woke up @ 9.. had my breakfast..

dis some homeworks.. watched NBA till 12..

listened to CDs.. talked to my father and my fren...

empty life huh?

btw heard a shocking news yesterday..

but i'm not very sure it's true or not...

1 of my fren told us (me n other frens) that he had f**ked a girl..

is dat true?

he has a very innocent face.. so boyish..

but i dunno whether i should believe dat or not..

50-50 laa...

if he really did dat.. i just hope he'll not repeat it again..

if he didn't do dat.. Alhamdulillah..

just avoid from doing dat thing guys..

or u'll regret it..

do u want to do it b4 ur marriage?

if you want, i'm sure u'll never have a good marriage..

i dun wat something like dat happens to me..

i pray i'll be given strength to avoid sex b4 marriage..

maybe for some people dat's ok..

but for me.. i'll never put my 'treasure' inside some1's servics..

only my wife deserves dat..

hurm... nothing to be shared anymore..

dat's all for now..

below is the lyric of 3 Doors Down's Here Without You..

my all time favourite... never fade..

dedicated for some1 who i always miss..

Wassalam..

Song: Here Without You

Artist: 3 Doors Down

A hundred days have made me older

Since the last time that i saw your pretty face

A thousand lies have made me colder

And i don't think i can look at this the same

But all these miles that seperate

Disappear now when i'm dreaming of your face

I'm here without you baby

But you're still on my lonely mind

I think about you baby

And i dream about you all the time

I'm here without you baby

But you're still with me in my dreams

And tonight it's only you and me

The miles just keep rollin'

As the people leave their way to say hello

I've heard this life was overrated

But i hope that it gets better as we go

I'm here without you baby

But you're still on my lonely mind

I think about you baby

And i dream about you all the time

I'm here without you baby

But you're still with me in my dreams

And tonight girl its only you and me

Everything i know,

and anywhere i go

It gets hard but it wont take away my love

And when the last one falls

When it's all said and done

It gets hard but it wont take away my love

I'm here without you baby

But you're still on my lonely mind

I think about you baby

And i dream about you all the time

I'm here without you baby

But you're still with me in my dreams

And tonight girl its only you and me

HiDd@Hidayah@Dayah

[[get through this narrow, endless road alone]]*|3:59 PM|

Wednesday, May 11, 2005

my 1st day as a teacher..
warghhh!!!
kind of tough coz there are lots of naugthy student..
i wonder why all teachers stand wif dis situation..
i really salute them for that..
i teach physics and lower form science..
i feel sorry for some students..
they cant even answer very simple question..
i dun have any idea how they are going to face their examination..
so sad!!!
hurm.. my mood is ok today
i was mad wif some1 for a very small reason..
i admit it was my fault..
but sometimes when my mood is in bad condition..
i can easily get piss off..
i cant deny dat..
sorry for my act..
erm...
i have something in mind.. but duhhhh.. it's hard!!
ok laa
dun have anything else to write..
just pray so dat everything will go smooth..
got to go..
Wassalam

HiDd@Hidayah@Dayah

[[get through this narrow, endless road alone]]*|12:36 PM|

Monday, May 09, 2005

hey... i went to ipoh 3 times within a week
erm.. 2day is Shad's birthday...
i tried to make it good even though i pissed off at 1st

HaPPy 21st BiRthDAy MakCIK SHaDNi WaRDIaH!!!

(jgn marah tau.. memain je..)
hurm..
got nothing to be shared here...
just wanna leave a msg to a friend
i'm sorry if my action drove u mad last nite..
but please.. dun get me wrong...
jgn salah sangka kt aku...
even though i know u might think dat i'm not a trusted person
forgive me, friend!
btw.. i dunno why i like to paste lyrics here lately..
sometime there are lots of lesson from a song..
btw below is a lyric of Indonesian band..
i bet lots of girl would scream like crazy if they see this band..
termasuk laa ade org tuh kan...
tp bukan org sini.. org tempat lain.. kt zimbabwe
hhahahaahah...
i dunno what's behind the title..
but dis song is really nice for me 2 lend my ears..
dat's all for today...
got to go..
Wassalam

Song: 2DSD
Artist: Peterpan

ku menatap langit
yang tenang
dan tak 'kan menangisi malam
tuk tetap berdiri
ku melawan hari
ku akan berarti
ku tak 'kan mati

mungkin masa ku tlah berlalu
mungkin hatiku tak berbentuk lagi
rasa ini tak kan terobati
tetapi mati takkan mengobati

* kumenatap langit yang tenang
dan tak 'kan menangisi malam
tuk tetap berdiri
ku melawan hari
ku akan berarti
ku tak 'kan mati

back to *

ku tak 'kan mati

HiDd@Hidayah@Dayah

[[get through this narrow, endless road alone]]*|6:39 PM|

Sunday, May 08, 2005

condition: blur, lonely and confused
*sighhhh*
i'm in above condition..
havent update dis page for quite sometime..
aku dah menganggur skrg..
got some offers
english teacher in private school in Shah Alam..
Chicken King staff in Taiping..
math teacher in Taiping...
dunno which one should i choose..
i want to discuss it wif someone who can gimme a suggestion..
of course i cant discuss it wif my parents coz they absolutely will ask me to go to Shah Alam..
hurghh...
there are pros and cons for these jobs..
i dun want to be away from my home..
i had spend over 300 days in kl last year..
i want just want to stay in my hometown...
for now there's no one can help me wif these choices..
*sigh again*
lantak laa.. aku maleh nk pikir...
mintak tolong ngn org pon susah gak....
bukan gune kederat pon.. nk pandangan je...
nasib laa aku ni jenis xberkira......
hurm... cut this..
since last nite, i feel sorry for someone...
a friend.. very close one.. i think she has something bugging her mind..
from her message, i know what's her feeling rite now..
i know u need someone.. but just face the truth dear...
maybe for now u have to be alone...
but i'm sure dat u'll meet ur Mr. Perfect.. really perfect for u..
InsyaAllah.. i always pray for ur happiness and so for the others...
and below is a lyric...
i really enjoy dis song.. and for a fren..
just read and feel dis lyric..
it might be sad.. but sometime when i feel left out..
i take dis lyric to motivate me..
btw the singer's name is quite weird..
dah xde nama lain laa tu.. huhu
till here..
got to go..
Wassalam

Song: Lonely
Artist: Akon

Lonely
I'm so lonely,
I have nobody,
For my owwnnn
I'm so lonely, I'm Mr. Lonely
I have nobody, For my owwnnn
I'm so lonely,

Yo this one here goes out to all my playas out there ya kno
got to have one good girl whose always been there like ya
Kno took all the bullshit then one day she cant take it no more and decides to leave

I woke up in the middle of the night
and I noticed my girl wasn't by my side
coulda sworn I was dreamin, for her I was
Feenin, so I hadda take a little ride,
back tracking ova these few years,
tryna figure out wat I do to make it go bad, cuz
Ever since my girl left me,

my whole life came crashin

I'm so lonely (so lonely),

I'm Mr. Lonely (Mr. Lonely)

I have nobody (I have nobody)

To call my own (to call my own) girl

I'm so lonely (so lonely)

I'm Mr. Lonely (Mr. Lonely)

I have nobody (I have nobody)

To call my own (to call my own) girl

Cant belive I hadda girl like you

and I just let you walk right outta my life,

after all I put u thru u still stuck

Around and stayed by my side, what really hurt me is

I broke ur heart, baby you were a good girl and I had no right, I

Really wanna make things right, cuz without u in my life girl

I'm so lonely (so lonely)

I'm Mr. Lonely (Mr. Lonely)

I have nobody (I have nobody to call my own)

To call my own (to call my own) girl

I'm so lonely (so lonely)

I'm Mr. Lonely (Mr. Lonely)

I have nobody (I have nobody)

To call my own (to call my own) girl

Been all about the world ain't neva met a girl

that can take the things that you been through

Never thought the day would come where you would get up

and run and I would be out chasing u

Cuz aint nowhere in the globe id rather be,

aint noone in the globe id rather see then the girl of my dreams that made me

Be so happy but now so lonely

So lonely (so lonely)

I'm Mr. Lonely (Mr. Lonely)

I have nobody (I have nobody)

To call my own (to call my own)

I'm so lonely (so lonely)

I'm Mr. Lonely (Mr. Lonely)

I have nobody (I have nobody)

To call my own (to call my own) girrll

Never thought that id be alone, I didnt hope you'd be gone this long,

I jus want u to call my phone, so stop playing girl and

Come on home (come on home), baby girl I didn't mean to shout,

I want me and you to work it out, I never wished Id ever

Hurt my baby, and its drivin me crazy cuz...

I'm so lonely (so lonely)

I'm Mr. Lonely (Mr. Lonely)

I have nobody (I have nobody)

To call my own (to call my own)

I'm so lonely (so lonely)

I'm Mr. Lonely (Mr. Lonely)

I have nobody (I have nobody)

To call my own (to call my own) girll

Lonely, so lonelySo lonely, (so lonely),

Mr. Lonely, so lonely

So lonely, so lonely, (so lonely),

Mr. Lonely

HiDd@Hidayah@Dayah

[[get through this narrow, endless road alone]]*|3:59 PM|

Sunday, May 01, 2005

i got flu today..

arghhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i really hate it man...

otak aku jd xbtul sket ble kena selsema ni...

for those who know me well.. u know how i act when i got flu..

really sick.. i feel like i cant do anything..

i dun want to go to clinic...

slalu sgt pegi.. cam dah immune dah..

i didn't go for work today..

i dun have any idea to put on dis blog...

.....................................

(blur)

got to go

wassalam

HiDd@Hidayah@Dayah

[[get through this narrow, endless road alone]]*|10:48 PM|

[[*Me, Myself and I*]]

HiDd @ Hidayah @ Dayah
December 20.Sagittarius
Student.Taiping,Perak,Malaysia
A person with deep wounded heart
Outspoken.Very sensitive.Love to laugh
Simple.Talkative.Energetic
Broken inside.Investigative
Addicted to McD, Vanilla Coke
Contact: Y! hidaz12

[[*InTeREstEd iN*]]

music, hi-tech gadget, friends, movies, levi's, mclaren, basketball

[[*HAtE aBOut*]]

liars and back-stabbers
pink stuffs
ikan sungai!!!

[[*wIShLiSt*]]

~~Levi's 536~~
~~Levi's spectacle~~
Nike shoes
Laptop
Normal life

[[*oBsESs iN*]]

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

[[*nOw pLayIng*]]

Artist: My Chemical Romance
Song: I'm Not OK (I Promise)

[[*UnFaDed MEmoRieS*]]

[[*aTTenTion!*]]
what's written in dis blog come straight from my heart.. i'm sorry for any offensive word or error in language.. dis is my blog.. i just throw i what i want and what i feel.. thanks!