Saturday, April 30, 2005
suddenly i can turn on my hp back..
yeah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
xjadi balik.. ilang risau aku.. xpasal² kne beli hp baru.. xnak aku...huhu.. i actually want a new hp but i think dis 3650 is still ok..
even though quite old but i dun give a damn bout it..
today maybe my last working day..
aku dah xnk keje kt tempat tu.. cam bodo je..xpasal² aku kne basuh pinggan sorg² kt blkg.. apehal?i dun care if it's not my job or what..
i really wonder why he asked me to wash all those dishes alone?
gilo ke apo? dah laa baru lepas ade function..3 jam aku menghadap pinggan..bengang laaa sbb sejak kebelakangan nih ader je tokey tu cam xpueh ati ngn aku..i feel like he's always looking for my mistake lately..
lantak laa.. aku xheran sgt pon klu xkeje kt situ.. rezeki mane² pon ade.. i've worked there for a month and i can see he's not a good employer..
suke sgt² marah pekerja depan org ramai...ingat org xde maruah ke? kesian aku tgk² pakcik yg tua kena marah camtu..klu ikut ati aku mase aku kena marah time customer ramai ari tu..nak je aku balas kate² dier n blah.. die ingat aku takot?but i dun want to do like dat coz i dun want to drop my own waterface..
i just want to see how long his business will last..
i'm not praying so dat he will get bankrupt or what..
but just to remind myself dat Allah is The Almighty..
erm.. just forget bout dat laa....
below is my favourite lyric...
i'm really crazy bout dis song recently..
i saw it's v-clip on MTV and i fall in love with it...
muhahaahahaahaha....
easy-to-listen song (for me laa)
can someone give me this song in mp3 format??? huhu
i think dat's all for now..
wassalam
Song: You and Me
Artist: Lifehouse
What day is it? And in what month?This clock never seemed so alive
I can't keep up and I can't back down
I've been losing so much time
Cause it's you and me and all of the people with nothing to do
Nothing to lose
And it's you and me and all of the people
And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you
All of the things that I want to say just aren't coming out right
I'm tripping on words
You've got my head spinning
I don't know where to go from here
Cause it's you and me and all of the people with nothing to do
Nothing to prove
And it's you and me and all of the people
And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you
There's something about you nowI can't quite figure out
Everything she does is beautiful
Everything she does is right
Cause it's you and me and all of the people with nothing to do
Nothing to lose
And it's you and me and all of the people
And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you
and me and all of the people with nothing to do
Nothing to prove
And it's you and me and all of the people
And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you
What day is it?And in what month?
This clock never seemed so alive
p/s: dun u think dis song is really nice? i think dis is really nice for someone laa hahaha
HiDd@Hidayah@Dayah
[[get through this narrow, endless road alone]]*|10:54 PM|
again.. i have to wait for long time to update dis blog..
i wish i could have streamyx @ my home..
nak wat camne.. benda alah tuh mahal sey.. xmampu..i dropped my hp just now.. i cant turn it on..
s**t man.. i hope no serious damage..
of course i have to wait to buy a new hp..
at least 3 months or wait 4 my ptptn loan...
arghhh.. no mood to write laa...
my hp is a very precious thing for me..
sometimes i feel like it's my only loyal companion..
i laugh, cry, mad n throw all my feelings using it..
poning palo den ni haaa....got to go..
wassalam..
HiDd@Hidayah@Dayah
[[get through this narrow, endless road alone]]*|10:21 PM|
Monday, April 25, 2005
*i try to make a new look*
after for long time.. the 'ghost' dat haunted me finally disappear...
Alhamdulillah.. thank Allah for all this..
for me, 80% of my life conflicts have gone...
the other 20% need to be settled by other persons..
i've done my part.. i've tried my best..
Alhamdulillah again..
everything's fine except for one thing..
i get pissed off for a very big matter for me
even though i know it might be a very small thing for others..
but i dun care bout the others..
i just cant stand when i think my dignity as man being challenge..
sorry to dat person..
but i have to protect my right and my pride as man..
i can compromise wif any matter except for something like dis..
i'm really sorry coz i did scold u..
i was very upset..
however.. i respect n thank u so much..
tell me the truth..
sememangnya kenyataan mmg menyakitkan..
btw.. today i got an crazy idea..
i have 2 frens.. a guy and a girl..
this girl is not really close to me..
but this guy is among the best person i ever know..
dis guy had been dumped by her gf recently..
and dis girl i think has no bf since... i dunno la..
but i got an idea to make them together...
dont u think it's ridicolous?
huuhuhuhuhu... it's all because dis girl had told me dat
she wants a permanent bf..
she told me her dream guy's criterias..
and the criterias match wif dis guy's..
dat's y i think bout it..
wahahahahahaha
am i stupid?
erm... hidayah, cant u stop giving nonsense idea?
ape² je la.. dah xde benda nk pikir..
cuti btul² buat aku nyer kepala mereng ar...
ok la
dat's all for today...
[[get through this narrow, endless road alone]]*|8:41 PM|
Thursday, April 21, 2005
i try to make my blog looks better..
thanks so much to Shad.. i really appreciate ur help dear...
erm... noting to say... i have no mood..
rase x sedap hati sejak tgh hari td...
x tau laa knapa...
i've done a lot of sins and dat makes me feel bad..
hati sape yg tenteram bile kite byk wat salah padaNya?
i dun have to tell what happened..
i just want to get back to the right path...
so dat i wont do the same mistake again and again...
i'm too weak to avoid dat..
hurgh... i'm a very bad person...
to Allah, my parents, my friends, my boo and everyone who i know..
ya Allah,
jadikan hambaMu ini lebih beriman..
dan masukkanlah hambaMu in dalam golongan yg sedikit...
tajamkan akal ku, kuatkan iman ku..
agar aku tidak lagi tersesat di dalam hidup yg telah kau berikan Nur Iman sebagai petunjuk dan cahaya...
Amin...
Wassalam...
HiDd@Hidayah@Dayah
[[get through this narrow, endless road alone]]*|6:20 PM|
Tuesday, April 19, 2005
i haven't wrote for a week..
i miss to write but unfortunately i dun have any time or strength to write..
i had been in so-so mood for last week..
good things and bads are equal..
when i feel so good, there will be a thing to make me down..
i dunno why..
but last week gave me a lot of lessons...
and i see them from every corner of my life
and i think bout them before i sleep..
look deep inside of me..
i can see dat i have lots of bad quality..
and these lessons make me feel i'm not a good son, good friend, good bf and good person generally..
thanks to those people who gave me the lessons..
even though i dun even know you all..
but here i just wanna say how i regret to be a bad son to my parents
to Ayah: saya dah betray ayah byk kali.. saya dah gagalkan cita2 ayah utk saya jd doktor..
saya xpernah cuba utk hargai kesusahan ayah utk sara saya dan kakak2 saya..
w/pon saya benci dgn sikap ayah yg pemarah tp saya tetap sayangkan ayah..saya mintak maaf dari sebesar2 dosa hingga yg paling kecik...
to Mama: saya mmg anak yg xbaik utk mama.. saya slalu tentang ape saje yg mama ckp..
bukan maksud saya nk menderhaka tp kadang2 mama yg memaksa buat camtu..
tp belum masuk liang lahad saya dah dpt rasa seksa apabila seorg anak melawan ibu bapa
saya rasa hidup saya xberkat.. so saya mintak maaf dari saat saya lahir sbb mama
dah byk susah masa nak lahirkan saya sampai sekarang..
i'm asking for ur forgiveness my parents.. it's hard for me to say but i really regret for what i've done.. i love u my FATHER, CHE HASHIM B. ABD RAHMAN and my MOTHER, SITI ISAH BT. AJOT...
dat's all for now..
wassalam
HiDd@Hidayah@Dayah
[[get through this narrow, endless road alone]]*|9:01 AM|
Sunday, April 10, 2005
hurrghh!!!
i'm tired like hell today...
it was soooooooo busy dis morning!!!
kenape sume org taiping suke breakfast kt luar haa?
and i became quite clumsy today...
siap tumpah kuah roti canai atas suar n kasut...
and because of dat.. in front of a customer... i said f**k!!!
i hate when i become clumsy... for those who really know me...
they know that i'm a perfectionist person.. but yeah...
ade benda yg kite xleh elakkan...
i need someone to massage my feet... any volunteer?
no topic for me to discuss..
i'm truly tired.. my brain is not functioning...
warghhh!!
till here...
wassalam..
[[get through this narrow, endless road alone]]*|5:58 PM|
Saturday, April 09, 2005
i haven't wrote for one week i think..
i got no time to update dis blog..
my job ends 5pm everyday... what a tiring job..
pagi² dah kene bgn.. org laen tarik selimut aku dah siap nk gi keje..
baru aku tau camne rasenye ble jd cam parents aku...
especially my mum... pegi bulan, balik pon bulan..
nk wat camne.. keje je laa sbb i need money..
i want to save as much as i can.. i really need them..
well.. my workplace is ok.. so-so laa.. not very good and not so bad..
i'm lucky (for now) coz i never been scolded by the cafe owner..
my 1st day was sucks.. i made lots of mistake..
but learned from them n try to do better...
hurm.... well i still feel empty...i dunno...
there's no excitement in my life recently..
except on last thursday nite.. i went out wif faizal, ayin n awie...
laughed.. laughed.. laughed...
yes.. they are my frens who always keep me laugh...
but they never forget to help me when i'm in trouble..
by the way.. i have a question bugging my head rite now..
why there are some people who always believe in horoscope?
i mean why they have to stick to their 'horoscope attitude'?
mmg laa sometimes ble kite mention pasal horoskop masing²,
ade sikap yg melambangkan horoskop kite tu..
mine is sagittarius.. but it doesn't mean i have to follow every sagittarius characteristic..
there are bad qualities bout sagittarius.. i think i dun have to defend those bads and say
"THAT'S THE WAY I AM!!"...
as a human, we need to adapt wif our surrounding.. do what people like..
accept people's opinion... unless u think u can live alone in dis world..
kenapa kite kena pertahankan sikap buruk kite?..
dan hanya berkata kite telah ditakdirkan utk jadi camtu kerana kite lahir pada horoskop itu atau ini..
for me dat opinion is wrong!
sbb kite seolah² percaya benda yg hanya diramal atau hasil pemerhatian org lain..
kite x percaya dgn qada & qadar...
ALLAH xkan ubah nasib sesuatu kaum itu selagi mereka tidak cuba utk berubah..
klu x silap aku itu maksud dr salah satu ayat AL-QURAN..
nobody's destinied to be perfect.. that's the reality we have to face..
tp bukan alasan untuk kite tidak berubah dan hanya percaya pada horoskop...
kite manusia.. penuh kelemahan.. jadi kenalpasti ape kelemahan kite...
sikap pentingkan diri.. kasar.. atau ape² saje yang negatif boleh mendatangkan dosa..
kalo kite hanya menurut sikap buruk berdasarkan horoskop kite,
maknenye kite lebih rela percayakan benda lain dan xhiraukan ttg dosa yg kite lakukan..
aku persoalkan benda nih bukan ape.. aku xnk pikiran aku terkongkong dgn pendapat camni..
klu camtu sume benda negatif dlm dunia ni kite xkan bole ubah..
be mature guys.. i'm not saying i'm truly mature person..
but i love to look deep into myself.. try to find my disadvantages..
tapi kalo ade yg rase aku salah.. leave ur comment below...
i can accept ur opinion guys...
i'm not always rite.. but i'm just giving my opinion but people who always believe in their horoscope..
maintain ur horoscope's good qualities, find and think about the bad one..
dat's all for now..
forgive me if anyone feels hurt wif my comment..
think bout it.. and correct me if i'm wrong guys..
wassalam...
HiDd @ Hidayah @ Dayah
[[get through this narrow, endless road alone]]*|9:37 PM|
Sunday, April 03, 2005
empty.. is all i feel for today..
maybe becoz i have no one to talk to.. no one to company me...
yeah.. i admit.. i need someone.. at least someone in my life..
i dun care who's dat person.. it can be anyone..
it can be my parents.. my bestfrens.. my frens.. even a stranger..
as long he/she ables to entertain me..
however... deep inside my heart.. i still feel like i've lost a person who i can talk to..
a person who was a very nice person to talk to..
i wish i could turn back the time..
and after what i've been through for almost 2 weeks.. i think..
i feel like i'm the only person who try to make dis problem disappear...
ntah laa.. aku je ke yg buat salah selama ni?
persoalan utama dlm kepala lutut aku nih..
knapa bile kite wat baik, jarang orang ingat?
tp bile kite wat silap, xkesah besar ke kecik ke, orang akan ingat smpai bile²..
aku rase xadil sbb bagi aku.. ble ade org wat salah ngn aku..
aku xnafikan aku mungkin marah tp aku pikir gak ape kebaikan org tuh kt aku..
aku mungkin hukum die tp dgn cara yang berpatutan..
bukannye nk puji diri tp ini laa hakikat nyer..
but unfortunate for me.. people always wrongly judge myself..
cam ade sorg mamat nih ckp ngn aku.. "ko nih baik sgt laa!!"
"ko biar je org wat camtu kt ko? kalo aku, silap byk laa org tu"
dis mamat was not my fren.. kenal gitu² je..
for now i think he can be one of my fren coz he's reliable and trusted person..
thx dude! aku ingt jasa ko..
2day i woke up @ 12pm.. quite late rite?
i slept @ 4 in morning.. well i always have sleepless nite lately..
went to bus station to buy my sister's ticket..
elok aku nk kuar ujan rintik².. aku pecut moto pegi n balik..
nasib x gol je td..
i wondered why my sis acts so nice today.. she treated me KFC..
i havent eat any fast food lately.. coz of two reasons..
1st - no money and 2nd - the person who always company me is 'invisible'
hurgh... nk balik umah pon tgh black-out.. bosan nyer idup..
i'll start my 'career' (huhu) tomorrow..
i always pray tomorrow will bring a shine to my life..
dat's all for now..
wassalam..
HiDd @ Hidayah @ Dayah
[[get through this narrow, endless road alone]]*|9:08 PM|
today is better than yesterday.. i was quite bz dis morning..
sapu lantai.. mop... basuh baju.. sidai baju.. macam² lagi...
it's better for me coz at least i have a reason why i should neglect my problems 4 a while..
and i see her to give her money back.. just for 1 minute i think..
and sleep on the evening.. hhuargh!!
i lonely rite now.. my parents go to UUM to fetch my sister...
had my dinner @ k.e corner... at last i have my meal for today.. 2 pon x abis laa..
wif someone... who i can call as very understanding friend...
seronok laa sembang ngn hang!!
at least i know i still got someone to company me when i'm alone...
even tho u dun give any suggestion but it's enough for me when u said understand me..
time kasih laa kawan.. huhu...
rase malas lak nk balik umah... got nothing to do..
so.. as a conclusion... today is better from yesterday..
Alhamdullillah...
dat's all for today...
from me...
HiDd @ Hidayah @ Dayah
[[get through this narrow, endless road alone]]*|3:56 PM|
Saturday, April 02, 2005
well, another boring day for me...
woke up @ 9.30 when my father asked me to clean up my house..
then suddenly i wanna find a job here.. i mean in my own hometown..
actually i've been looking for a job in taiping for almost a month i think..
and i got it today.. keje gerai makan kt seblah library... jadi la..
i asked my bro last two days for a job near his house in kelana jaya..
he called me and asked me to come for an interview @ Giant, Kelana Jaya..
honestly.. i dun want to work there.. i mean KL coz.. ntah laa..
aku x rasa yang aku cukup sedia nk keje kt sana sbb perasaan aku still x btul..
aku cuma nak duit sbb aku perlukan duit tu... ade hajat yang aku kena selesaikan..
the salary in my new workplace is cheap but i dun care..
i just wanna work for money without going to other place..
erm.. i've learned something today... how to accept all problems and difficulties in my life..
tima kasey laa tok khatib kt masjid...
u made me realize dat i'm muslim.. and i've to believe in 'qada & qadar'
benda asas yang dah lama aku tak ingat dan x praktikan
just accept whatever i have to face or experience.. dat makes me feel like
Allah still loves me...
Dia yang Maha Berkuasa dan semua kesusahan yang aku hadapi skrang adalah kemahuanNya..
mungkin nih sume balasan atas ape yang aku pernah buat.. xkesah laa samada sakitkan hati parents,
kawan² or org yg aku sayang.. atau pon dosa² lain..
i'm not a good Muslim.. i've neglected all my responsible as a muslim
learn from my mistakes.. i want to be someone new..
i dont wanna be anything other than what i've trying to be lately.. aku nk berubah..
so.. kt sini buat sapa² yg pernah terluka, sakit jiwa, bengang n marah ngn aku...
aku susun 10 jari tgn + 10 jari kaki (huhu) mintak maaf... maafkan laa aku..
for those who read dis.. tell ur frens who know me... dat i'm asking for their forgiveness too..
let me be a person who u like.. i cant me everyone satisfy with me but i'm doing my best..
guide me my frens.. right me when i'm wrong..
dat's all for today..
wassalam
HiDd @ Hidayah @ Dayah
[[get through this narrow, endless road alone]]*|1:02 PM|
[[*Me, Myself and I*]]
[[*aTTenTion!*]]
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